And now, as promised, Canada. The land of beavers and mounties. Niagara Falls. The first thing we did upon arriving in this strange new land was have lunch at Hooters. Yea, we're like that. Guess what was playing on the 7 flat-screen plasma TVs hanging from the ceiling?
Hockey. And guess what the waitress said when we walked in? "Bad weather out there, eh?" Canada proves its stereotypes are not stereotypes at all, but absolute truths. We ordered ourselves some wings and Molsen Canadians (Seriously, what is that all about? They actually call the beer 'Canadian' in Canada. Weirdos). Then, on to the big show. The Falls. They really are quiet beautiful, if you can elbow your way past the 4.7 million other tourists hanging over the fence to take pictures. There is something awe-inspiring about the sheer power there. That continuous, low rumble; the ever-present mist hanging overhead, the savage beauty of nature in the raw.
I counted at least 3 haunted houses, 2 wax museums, an Olde Tyme picture place, and a Ripley's Believe it or Not. It made me throw up in my mouth a little bit. I wish I had taken a picture of the wax museum. Louis Tussauds. Not to be confused with Madame Tussauds. Must be Louie's ex. She jumped ship and moved to the States, I guess.
Those Canadians sure love their beavers.
These are the American Falls. Nice, huh?
These are the Canadian Falls. They're much better. Like most things in Canada. Even the damn ketchup tastes
better! I was gonna sneak some Heinz home through customs. But they have guns. And something to prove.
At night they light up the Falls so you can see them. Very cool.
And there's a fireworks display over the water. Also well-received.
*Note the traffic at a complete stand-still on the bottom left. It must be awesome living there.
The Falls after a few drinks at the casino bar
The only thing that took away from the experience -- aside from the teeming masses with camcorders -- was the cheese. There was so much cheese, you couldn't walk 2 feet without stepping in it. I was totally afraid to have a Whopper.
I counted at least 3 haunted houses, 2 wax museums, an Olde Tyme picture place, and a Ripley's Believe it or Not. It made me throw up in my mouth a little bit. I wish I had taken a picture of the wax museum. Louis Tussauds. Not to be confused with Madame Tussauds. Must be Louie's ex. She jumped ship and moved to the States, I guess.
That's my sexy new Mountie husband. How'd that get in here?
Those Canadians sure love their beavers.To summarize Niagara Falls: savagery, awe, body odor, beauty, beavers, gambling, cheese, water, more savagery, Frankenstein, and hockey.
And I forgot my umbrella in Hooters.
Mounties are sexy! How did I not notice this before? *Note to self: More trips to Canada*
ReplyDeleteOh how I love Canada. CableDad and I were forced to move back to the States about 2 years ago... but before that was 5 years of bliss in Toronto.....
ReplyDeleteAnd yeah, everything is just better up there.
I watched all the Hockey playoffs this year and loved it. After it was over, I decided I want to move to Canada, but I pretty much want to move to anywhere other than where I'm living these days.
ReplyDeleteLast time I was up there though it was great. I recommend going to Niagara Falls at 6AM on a Thursday in November. That's when I went and there was absolutely no one there then.
I can remember the (Canada side) approach to Niagra Falls as if I had been there yesterday -- that enormous silent wall of green water moving endlessly towards the top of the falls, and the crashing sound of it going over...breathtaking.
ReplyDeleteI hope you're having (had?) a great trip, even despite the insane wax museum stuff. A very surreal honeymoon destination, huh?
Despite the cheese, I would like to go back....now we can formulate a plan to avoid le fromage.
ReplyDeleteWe've decided to split the difference and move to the upper peninsula of Michigan and be Yoopers.
ReplyDeleteAhhhh... Now I don't have to go to the Falls myself. :)
ReplyDeleteThey really are amazing, though...
We went there. The falls at nite. It was great, we went through one of the haunted houses(Which sucked) and ate at the ruby tuesdays near the lego house thing. Unfortunately i was real low on cash, so i couldnt go into the sideways ripely's building. Its just like me to follow in my sister's steps.
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